Title: To Have and To Hold Pro-3/?
Author: Califi
Posted: /04
Rating: Up to R/N-17
Email
Category: AU/Angst/mystery
Content: eventual C/A friendship/romance. [B/A post-hell without smooshies and all that crap.
Summary: An oath made comes back to haunt.
Disclaimer: Not mine, so don't sue.
Spoilers: BTVS 3- totally AU with a few references to the Seasons.
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angelverse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made.
Distribution: GT/AA/FSB. Anywhere else, just ask
Notes: actually dreamed this, and it was still with me when I woke up, so bear with me, okay? One thing... Angel in this is slightly different than S3 Cannon Post Hell. More ‘atuned’ to his demon, heh.
Thanks/Dedication: To Hely, my Beta. Mwah!
Feedback: Would be cool
A/N: reworked chapters
Prologue
“Take her now- we are running out of time. ”The well-dressed old magi held out the heavily swathed babe desperately; impatience temporarily melting away the weariness in his watery blue eyes. “Remember your oath, vampire.”
“An oath given under duress, if I recall, old man,” Gold eyes raked the slight form with disdain, only briefly resting on the bundle held in his shaking arms.
“Let us not argue semantics.” Anxiety choked his surprisingly strong voice as the magi again held out the baby. The sound of intense battle became louder by the second; time was running out.
With a low growl, the vampire snatched the bundle, his gentle grip at odds with the savagery on his dark face. Relief flooded the old man's face, then he fumbled under his robes quickly, hand emerging seconds later with a small blue orb.
“This will take you to a random place in time- most likely some point in the future,” he explained hurriedly, as he held it out. “ Once there, you can again use the orb to return approximately a month from now- more than enough time for them to have given up.” With a reluctant sigh, the vampire snatched the orb and turned to go- halted abruptly by the magi, who uncharacteristically begged: “Keep her safe. She is precious to us all.”
Not deigning to reply, the dark demon continued his flight, the babe held close to his powerful chest. He didn't stop until he reached the battlements; the smell of death now hung heavily in the air. Taking a deep, unneeded breath, he held out the orb, which began to glow eerily- then bright light seared his eyes.
Once dimmed, he found himself in a secluded street.
“What the…” he dove out of the way as a fast moving object of light and metal streaked towards him, a loud deep screeching emitting from the strange carriage almost piercing his ear drums.
As it disappeared into the distance, his eyes were drawn to his arms by a startled cry. Gold eyes met with the wide dark blue of a newborn, tinged with the colors of autumn. Without thinking, the demon rocked the little bundle and soothed the distressed babe, then jerked his head up to look around, relieved that no one had witnessed his momentary gentleness. He was a feared vampire, for Christ sakes!
Inwardly cursing the day he'd ever crossed paths with the powerful magi and his reckless agreement of 'body guard'- well, he hadn't had much choice at the time; he lifted sharp eyes to assess his whereabouts. After several minutes of checking out the few abodes in the quiet street, the vampire headed towards the only one with lights burning within. Clearing the imposing gates effortlessly, he soundlessly approached the equally imposing manor.
After eyeing the couple in one of the downstairs rooms, he made his decision. Making his way to the front entrance, he gently laid his bundle at the large door, rapped the heavy wood and melted into the shadows to wait. Within minutes the door opened and the young man, closely followed by the pretty woman looked around inquiringly. The sound of a weak whimper drew their eyes to the ground, and with a gasp of surprise, the young woman stepped past the man, stooped down and swept up the bundle of living flesh and blood.
“Oh my God, Matthew, look- it's a baby!” checking the darkened grounds one more time, the couple retreated back into their home and closed the door firmly behind them.
Satisfied he'd kept his end of the bargain- somewhat, the demon retreated further away, shrugging off the sweet scent of the babe that clung to his clothes and extracted the orb holding it out carefully.
“Their precious little bundle is safe- she doesn't need me around.” he reasoned; he'd probably end up eating the little morsel anyway. After all, Angelus, the Scourge of Europe wasn't known for his philanthropy. The blinding light that engulfed him once again hid his careless shrug…
***
The scent he'd all but forgotten teased his sensitive nostrils, and for a moment, his mind went back to a much darker time. His recollection was impaired by memories that had changed his fate around the same time, and after several moments of struggling to remember why that unique scent teased him so, he gave up trying.
“Angel? Are you okay?” the uncertain tone of his ex-girlfriend's voice brought him back to the present abruptly and he turned to give a faint reassuring nod in reply.
Satisfied, the blonde Slayer again turned to the young boy and accompanying red head and picked up where she'd left off.
Angel sat back in his seat in the Bronze and slipped into his role of seen and not heard- but his dark brown eyes kept being drawn to the beautiful brunette who sat a few tables away talking animatedly to the tweed- clad young British Watcher who'd recently arrived to take over Rupert Giles' position in Buffy Summers' life.
When the vampire had brushed past her half an hour ago, the scent that had emanated from her had stirred something within him. Was it her perfume, he wondered? - Quickly dismissing the synthetic aroma spring flowers. No, the scent that had teased his senses had been all her own.
That confused Angel all the more. A vampire instinctually scented humans when around them, so he was already familiar with Cordelia's unique essence -so why hadn't it disturbed his memory the first time they'd ever met? Shrugging his broad shoulders again and stifling an irritated sigh, he pushed it from his mind. No doubt it would come to him later.
But his eyes still drifted towards her for the rest of the night
Part 1
Wesley Wyndham Pryce had left after a short chat, and Cordelia again cleared her face of all expression except a 'keep away' iciness that surrounded her like an invisible cloak.
She rubbed the back of her nape for the hundredth time that night, and finally turned around to check out the crowd behind her.
Amber-lit eyes ran over the back of the Bronze, flitting from table to table restlessly; pausing when her ex boyfriend's hunched body caught her eye. Her full mouth tightened with bitterness as she took in his stupid grin and adoring eyes…. aimed towards the blonde powerhouse. bastard].
Her gaze rested momentarily on the little redhead, who sat staring at the stage with wide eyes. Oz' band was up as usual, and a part of Cordelia was pissed that the witch had been forgiven so quickly. Oz was too nice for his own good; something she herself would *never* be where her cheating ex was concerned. Bastard!
Her eyes dismissed him and flickered back to the blonde.
Buffy Summers looked like someone had stolen her puppy. Not surprising though. Nothing had been the same since her vampire had returned from hell. Even *she* could read the 'hands off' vibe coming from him. To say that Angel must be pissed at being sent to hell for, what? A century? - With a soul, must've hurt beyond the telling.
She'd been in the library and overheard him tell the slayer that spilled blood would have been enough to stop Acathla… Seeing Buffy run out of the stacks in tears. At the time, things were okay between herself and that bastard, Xander Harris, so she'd been more than willing to feel sorry for the girl – after all, it wasn’t as if Buffy had known, was it? Not that anyone told her anything. Cordelia let out a soft ‘pfft’. She always found out the hard way. But that new feel-good factor between her and the others had changed rapidly after her accident. The blonde's overzealous defense of Xander Cheating Harris, to a point where it almost seemed like he was the injured party had soon put an end to any sympathy she'd felt.
So Buffy Summers had lost her little puppy, and right now, Cordelia Chase couldn't give a damn. Though she did wonder why the vampire still hung around; still fought by her side. Cordelia shrugged her slim shoulders. What else could he do, she supposed? Brood and mope in the shadows?
Like she had done the first week or so after The Betrayal?
Kudos for him for having more backbone than she ever rated him with. But if it had been her, she'd have left Sunnyhell wayyyy behind her never to look back.
Her time would come.
She blinked, suddenly realizing her gaze had moved to the aforementioned vampire…chocolate brown irises stared unblinkingly back at her. Never being privy to Angel's undivided attention, Cordelia shivered, a weird, tingly sensation that ran down her spine and unsettled her. Lifting a regal brow, her own gaze deliberately cooled.
His eyes remained locked with hers, and she could have sworn through all the intensity of his stare, a glint of humor shone. Obviously, he couldn't take a hint that his unexpected attention wasn't needed or wanted, Cordelia thought, tilting her chin and scowling as she attempted to out stare him…. but lost after several long seconds.
Does he ever blink? Jeeze! With an annoyed pfft she finally turned her back on him, forcing her eyes back to the stage, and attempted to ignore the prickles that ran across her nape. Stupid vampire.
***
Angel couldn't hold back the grin of triumph when the brunette lost the staring contest and huffily showed him her back... but the smirk soon faded away. He hadn't missed the bitter pain that had tightened her face when those lovely eyes had rested momentarily on her ex-boyfriend, the veneer of cool disdain unexpectedly cracking to reveal a vulnerability he'd never even thought the girl possessed.
Good riddance. The words flashed through his mind, but he felt no guilt at thinking them. In fact, after catching that brief glimpse, there was no doubt in his mind that Cordelia was better off without him. Angel had always been aware of the worshipping way the boys eyes would rest on Buffy- hell, he'd been just as sappy once. He cringed as he recalled just *how* he'd subjugated his own personality to fit into her innocent view of the world at the time...
Back to the boy; not satisfied with hanging on every word the slayer uttered, a beautiful girl on his arm; no ...Harris had to compound it all by 'sucking face', as Buffy put it, with his supposed best friend, Willow.
That was a surprise.... or was it? As sweet as the little witch seemed, he'd often picked up on the odd acid coated comments with regards to Cordelia Chase. Although there was no doubting Willow's predominantly shy, gentle and self-effacing nature, it would have been naive to believe she was incapable of harm. She wouldn't have been human otherwise.
Angel watched as the brunette rub her nape yet again and fidget uncomfortably in her seat, but he couldn't keep his eyes off her. That weird nagging feeling just wouldn't go away. Continuing to stare, it slowly dawned on him that the former Queen C sat alone, an unheard of situation where the girl was concerned.
Apparently, she'd lost more than an undeserving boyfriend.
But the outwardly confident set of her figure sitting in that chair, at the table alone, shouted out to the club that she, Cordelia Chase, didn't need people around her to be complete. Angel admired that in her.
It must have taken a lot of nerve to waltz into the Bronze knowing she was excluded from the High School social lifestyle she'd once reigned over, and take a seat center-stage almost regal in her bearing and seemingly without a care in the world.
'Regal'... that word rang bells, but not loud enough to give clarity so desperately needed....
*****
He shot upright, clenching the sheets in grasping fingers; eyes wide and dilated.
Angel could still feel the warmth of the babe cradled in his once-soulless arms, and hear the soft wails. The words of the magi filtered through his mind: ”Take her now- we are running out of time” … “Remember your oath, vampire.”
Memories of that time rushed in with a vengeance…. The angry mob surrounding him that would surely have dusted him - the timely intervention of the powerful old man… Angelus had no feelings of loyalty towards him, and only fleeting gratefulness.
If not for the man's power, his soulless counterpart would have turned on him after laughing derisively at the demands of his services.
Bodyguard of a human newborn *was* laughable to a demon such as himself, but given no choice, he did so reluctantly. Traitors had slaughtered the parents in their bed before escaping by the skin of their teeth after a failed attempt on the infant who'd, luckily been sequestered in another part of the castle. After that, the castle had been heavily fortified against a previously large and unknown army that suddenly showed up on the boundaries.
For several months the castle was under heavy siege then the fortifications were finally breached as the enemy increased their efforts to get to the one they were after and kill her. Once, Angelus had asked what they wanted with a mere babe, but the magi had ignored his question and he'd shrugged, his mild curiosity too fleeting to pursue it.
The memory of that night had rushed through his sleeping mind like a Tsunami: his travel into the future, and his return.
Surprisingly, the magi hadn't seemed angry that Angelus had returned empty handed- merely stepped back, relief flowing through his old body.
“You may leave, vampire.” For a moment, Angelus just stood staring at him in surprise. That's it?
Taking a cursory look around, he realized time had passed and the once magnificent castle now lay in smoldering ruins. The only sign of life the old man in front of him. Shrugging his broad shoulders carelessly, he turned and melted into the shadows.
When had Angel forgotten? Then he recalled reaching into his pocket once far enough away from the shadowed remains of the castle.
The orb still nestled within, but as he pulled it out, it crumbled to fine dust…. and that was when all memory of his brief sojourn as a bodyguard melted away.
***
Pacing along the quiet road outside the mansion, Angel let déjà vu slide over him; he remembered this very place.
Being the first time he'd ventured to this side of Sunnydale was probably why he'd never felt the connection. Movement across the wide road caught his sharp eyes and he glanced up.
Except for ivy trailing up along the facade, the mansion was as he remembered. His brow furrowed into a deep V as he watched a young woman reach out to clasp the drapes, slowly drawing them closed.
Stunned brown eyes traced the smooth lines of her softly bronzed skin, the full generous tilt of her mouth, and the almond eyes with colors of autumn held within. Angel swallowed thickly and kept his eyes trained on her face until the drapes drew fully to hide the figure that was the one and only Cordelia Chase.
*****
Cordelia hesitated outside the library, chewing on her bottom lip as she stared unseeingly at the wood of the door. Now she was there, the idea of entering a place chock full of memories seemed daunting, especially since most of them were bad, she thought to herself bitterly.
But she needed the text book for class, already putting it off for God knows how long and her teacher was already hinting at detention for a very long time if her assignment wasn't completed…. which brought her back to where she was now. “God, why the hell do they have to have books in that place,” she hissed almost inaudibly.
“Probably because it's the library,” she let out a startled yelp when the rich male voice sounded directly in her ear nearly causing her heart to stop for a second, then a large pale hand appeared over her shoulder and rested flat against the door, pushing it open. Her spine stiffened when a cool hard body briefly pressed against hers, leaving her with no choice but to move forward.
Scowling with annoyance, Cordelia put distance between them before tossing over her shoulder frostily, “Crowd much? And jeeze, get a bell or something, you undead jerk.” As soon as the words left her mouth, she felt ashamed for taking her issues out on the vampire, but what the hell; he was one of them, wasn't he, so why should she feel bad about it?.
Mentally shrugging off both the uncomfortable burn of dark eyes drilling holes into the back of her head and accompanying guilt, Cordelia continued across the gleaming wooden floor, keeping her eyes trained fixedly on the checkout desk directly ahead. Hopefully, if she closed down her brain enough, the soft hum of voices that had halted abruptly and then began again as she entered, would filter out to a point where it was bearable.
“No need to take your inner bitch out on Angel, Cordelia.” Cool hazel eyes collided with indignant blue as Buffy Summers chastised her. One fine dark brow arched haughtily, her expression on of complete disdain.
“Inner?” Xander jumped in promptly his tone laced with incredulity as he glanced furtively over to the checkout counter before adding snarkily, “Don't forget the outer one to.” For a split second, her eyes, dripping with ice turned his way and clashed until he flushed and broke contact. Cordelia pffted contemptuously and promptly presented him with her back. Bastard! He wasn't worth her time or acid replies.
Giles had risen to his feet within seconds of their arrival and had left the long table the others sat round to approach the checking counter. An inquiring smile with an edge of hesitance graced his features as he looked across the smooth surface of the counter that separated them. “Good evening, Cordelia. How can I help you?” She wordlessly held out a slip of paper and, after a pause, he took it, clearing his throat uncomfortably as he easily picked up her reluctance to reply.
Glancing down at the neat writing, Giles nodded. “Ah, King Lear; …I think we have one or two of those left.” he couldn't keep the relief out of his voice, being glad to be able to help- even if it was something as simple as a book request. Being aware of the reasons for Cordelia's changed demeanor and feeling awkward with the whole situation, Giles wished he could do more. “Up the stairs, third stack on the right.” Handing back the slip, he cleared his throat, preparing to ask how she was, but before he could open his mouth, she'd turned and click-clacked away.
Heaving a weary sigh, he shook his head sadly; a part of him was not surprised at her dismissive attitude. Up until this moment, Giles hadn't thought to ask her, which didn't sit too well on his shoulders. Not that he'd seen her since to do so. Guilt ate into him as it crossed his mind that it wouldn't have been too difficult to seek her out, but to be honest, after hearing one side of the events of that night, it had been enough for him to realize interference, even well meaning might have made things worse. But then again, him inquiring after one of his 'special' students welfare surely wouldn't have caused discord between him and the others. Feeble, his conscience nudged him and the guilt remained.
Making his way back to the others, Giles threw a warning glance towards Xander on the way, who was still furtively watching as his ex-girlfriend strode gracefully across the room. On catching the older man's eye, he flushed again and instantly ducked his head, eyes lowered as he attempted to concentrate on the crabby old book he was supposed to be reading. Willow had kept her head down from the go get, looking suitably shamed, and Buffy doodled on the notepad next to her open math book, lost in a world of Logarithms and equally brain-draining formulae.
Watching her ex boyfriend walk past the table moments earlier without so much as an acknowledgment had stung, and after lingering on his retreating black-clad figure as he'd instead opted for his usual place in the furthest corner, and meeting his eyes briefly as he'd turned to make himself comfortable, math had suddenly seemed much more approachable than dark unreadable eyes.
Cordelia reached the stairs and looked down at the vampire who now reclined, legs stretched out and body outwardly relaxed on the lower steps. After waiting and then tapping one foot impatiently, she finally glowered into his expressionless face. “I need to get through.” Growing annoyance dripped from every word. The stupid vampire had seen her coming and just continued to sit there looking to all the world like he was settling in for the long haul.
On seeing the approach of the brunette, Angel at first had been about to rise and move out of the way, but something inside had told him to wait. After the disconcerting scent at the Bronze, the dream that still plagued him now, and then compounded by his stunned discovery at the Mansion made him to want to confront her and talk. But that wasn't even an option. One, he had no clue as to even broach something he wasn't quite sure about himself. Two, she'd never believe him and most likely threaten to tell Buffy...
And three. The fact that he'd never made any effort to talk to Cordelia properly or even get to know her would instantly cause suspicion and probably have her accuse him of some obscure ulterior motive. Add that to the fact that the Harris boy had severed the Scoobie connection with his inexplicable behavior, which in turn had caused animosity between her and them... Angel stared up at her for a long moment before deciding to play it another way.
Hesitating deliberately before lithely rising to his feet Angel continued to block the way staring down at her silently. Her earlier comment had, surprisingly, stung. Even at her worst, Cordelia Chase had never intentionally insulted him. Although used to her blunt openness, malice had always been absent, and that changed things too. A shiver of anticipation ran along his skin as he wondered how Cordelia chase would deal with a taste of what was not so hidden under his skin lately.
Cordelia shifted irritably under his unblinking stare. “Could you like, move- or can vampires become discorporate on demand and, as usual, no one ever bothered to tell me?” At the involuntary flash of surprise that flickered in his dark eyes, Cordelia's plush mouth thinned. Beauty didn't necessarily mean dumb, and for some reason, the fact that *he* fell into the trap of stereotyping too, disappointed her.
Angel's pale mouth twitched suspiciously. The fleeting feeling that he was somehow freakily reading her mind caused her glare to intensify. “Nope; I'm Corporate, just like you,” Angel folded his powerful arms across his chest and continued to stare down at her. He hadn't missed her reaction to his involuntary surprise, and maybe he *had* been guilty of jumping to conclusions- but as he'd admitted to himself moments before, it wasn't as if he'd made any effort to find out.
She hmphed and walked a step forward, reaching out a hand to push him out of the way. “Well, unlike you, I have a life, and this detour is seriously eating into it- so move your undead ass,” when a large hand grabbed her wrist, Cordelia jolted and involuntarily gulped in fear, rethinking her aggressive display of attitude. Not a good idea with the former Scourge of Europe, with or without a soul, she reminded herself as her wide eyes locked with his now unreadable gaze. “Let go,” her demand husky, suspiciously sounding like a plea to her ears, which annoyed her all over again.
“I *said*, let go, mister grabby hands!” Cordelia's voice was low yet harsh as she tugged at her captured wrist, the hint of fear in her expressive eyes dissolving into anger as she glanced from his restraining hand to his face.
The demon tugged at its leash as Angel stared into her disdainful hazel gaze and irritation flared. He was getting more than a little sick and tired of the contempt these people continuously doled out. Fair enough, him losing his soul and giving them all a wake up call of what he was capable of gave them good reason, but even before that… instinct took over for a moment and Angel tugged her wrist, just enough to pull Cordelia off balance. Her chest connected with his abruptly but before she could complain his dark head dipped to hers.
“No need to be rude,” he purred softly in her ear, all the while keeping an eye on the group around the table several yards away. No one so far had looked over and noticed the little scene playing out. Luckily for him.
Even though relations were bad between her and the others, Angel didn't doubt they'd defend her if they thought he was threatening or hurting her. But still he took a moment to breathe in that so familiar scent before gently releasing her wrist, stepping back and moving out of the way of the stairs. “Is a simple 'excuse me' too much to ask?” He added softly.
Cordelia's eyes, wide and wary were still locked with his expressionless gaze, the flare of anger she'd seen briefly as he'd yanked her close gone as quickly as it had appeared. She shook her head dumbly and rubbed her wrist, not that he'd hurt her, but right now she felt the need for something to occupy her nervous eyes whilst she walked shakily past him. What was his problem? She wondered, surprised.
The vampire didn't usually react to snide remarks…okay, hers weren't exactly 'snide', but… Maybe he'd changed a lot more than she'd originally assumed. In future, acid barbs would be saved for the ones who deserved them, she decided, not a little guiltily, when reluctantly admitting to herself that she'd let loose her own anger on the wrong person.
Angel watched her ascend the stairs silently, waiting until she was out of sight before releasing a short sigh and leaning back against the side rather than settling back down.
There were subtle differences in her scent, he mused. Rich and ripe came to mind. The delicate fragrance of baby had matured into something more… addictive. A frown marred his pale brow for a moment, wondering where that had come from; he could still feel the soft press of her warm breasts against his chest, and male appreciation had tightened his groin. With a difficulty that irritated, he relaxed and forcefully cleared his mind of anything sexual in regards to Cordelia Chase.
For a start he had no right. Barely even knowing the girl behind the beautiful veneer, Angel reminded himself with a touch of shame. 'Bait girl' and 'Sporedelia' the only descriptors ever used around him where Cordelia Chase was concerned in the past. He'd never given it a second thought and had stood back, letting the others harsh comments go over his head - too absorbed in his then new feelings towards the Slayer… his darkening eyes lifted from the contemplation of his boot-shod feet and instead looked over to rest on the blonde in question for a moment. His mouth twisted with more than a touch of bitter regret.
Those uncontrollable feelings had died a death pretty much soon after he arrived in the hell dimension. Just a few weeks in that place was enough that at one stage, vengeful thoughts had filled his tortured mind and had, for a long time wanted to get his hands on her for all the wrong reasons. That he could feel that way with a soul had taught him a valuable lesson. Assuming that having one was enough to be 'good' was not only naive, but dangerous.
When once back and sane enough to be aware of his surroundings, the need to seek out attempt to recreate the forbidden feelings he'd had for her had failed abysmally. It had been difficult to tell her in the end that things- *he'd* changed, and they couldn't go back to how they'd once been, but he'd done it… letting her believe for a time that repeating old mistakes was too risky. Then the truth had come out about Acathla. Apparently Rupert Giles’ hurried research hadn’t got him to that particular bit of valuable information- or so Buffy Assumed.
Personally, Angel wouldn’t have been surprised to find out the Watcher was more than aware of it. Not that he blamed him, after what his soulless counterpart had done to the man. In the meantime, harsh words were exchanged between himself and the Slayer, followed by his apology. But his irrational resentment lingered and things became even more strained between them afterwards.
The night Spike kidnapped the little witch and Harris, Angel had watched her silently when Buffy had turned up to 'break up' with him. As tears filled her big, tortured blue eyes; Angel had half wondered if her tune would have changed if he'd made her aware of the now permanent state of his soul. Given a second chance by unknown forces, with no clause to risk the return of Angelus… but it suited him to keep that to himself and agree, whilst Buffy stood there trying to convince herself that it was the only thing that was stopping them getting together.
Angel had changed- and not all for the better, he realized, still wondering why he remained in this place; maybe it was time to move on- for the good of them all… but even as his eyes flickered towards the stacks above, he knew leaving wasn't an option right now. The need to find out what it was that drove that old man to such lengths as to hide the babe in the future was too strong. And entrusting him whilst soulless still beggared belief. The man had either been foolishly naive, or something else was going on he had yet to find out about.
This made it personal, and although the reluctant oath had been dragged out of his alter ego, Angel couldn't shake off the sense of responsibility that ate into him on finding her once again- it also got him wondering if there was more to him coming to Sunnydale than just to cross paths with the Slayer. Each time Angel thought about it, the more positive he was that the abrupt recollection was due to more than a coincidence.
Whistler hadn't done more than show him Buffy Summers and get him to take a long, hard look at himself. There had been no hints as to any other reason for his presence at the Hellmouth… Where were these guys when you needed answers? The vampire didn't like having his strings yanked by unknown hands, and in his mind, there was no such thing as coincidence.
“Angel? Wanna patrol with us?” The blonde's high voice stirred him out of his thoughts.
Glancing up the stairs, he felt a twinge of self-annoyance. Letting anger show was probably the worse thing he could have done under the circumstances, and not just because he felt guilty. The strong feeling that his earlier action had been on a par of shooting himself in the foot didn't sit well.
The last thing he needed right now was for Cordelia to avoid him- not if he wanted to find out what this blast from the past meant. Turning his distracted gaze towards the Slayer, who repeated his name with a touch of irritation, Angel shook himself and nodded absently and walked over to follow her, Harris and Willow out of the library.
Part 2
“Stupid, stupid car!” Cordelia slammed her hands on the steering wheel in temper after her fourth attempt to start the Corvette failed.
The Bronze had closed its doors and stragglers out of earshot; all other cars having left by the time she realized the motor refused point blank to turn over. Looking around, a half stifled growl of rage left her mouth when realizing the only way home was by foot.
After stupidly leaving her cell at school, and only having a credit card on her, cabs were out; not like she could grab some change from her parents when she got home, them being in Europe on a business trip.
“Just great!” hitting the steering wheel one last time, Cordelia gathered her bag and denim jacket and climbed out of her 'dumb car!' slamming the door and kicking the paintwork angrily; belatedly regretting it when she stubbed toes that were left unprotected by the sandals she wore.
This was that stupid vampire's entire fault, her mouth tightened into a thin line as she recalled their earlier confrontation. He'd rattled her with his Cro Magno display, and on finding him gone when she'd returned below, her only thought had been to get the hell out of there, forgetting all about her cell in the process.
Taking one last look around and at the same time shrugging on her jacket, she walked hurriedly away from the club, wincing as her wooden kitten heels rang hollowly into the night. “Might as well be wearing a sign round my neck saying, “Buffet free-for-all,” she muttered under her breath as she turned into the high street.
Except for the odd 'creepzoid' hanging about- whom she'd succeeded in putting off by glaring frostily, Cordelia managed to walk at least half a mile; although it had felt a hell of a lot longer in her high heels! The further she walked from town, the quieter it became, and the sweat trickling between her breasts wasn't merely from exertion.
Her wide eyes darted anxiously around as she hugged her thin jacket around her body- when a large cool hand suddenly tapped her on the shoulder. A strangled scream tore from her mouth even as she whirled around- so rapidly one of her heels twisted and snapped.
Her arms wind-milled for a moment before her body began to fall to the side- caught in powerful arms. Gasping with fear she looked up…into concerned brown eyes.
“Angel! What the hell is your damage, huh?” Anger escalated even as blind relief flooded her. Pulling against the firm hold on her waist.
The vampire loosened his grip, instead latching onto her arms to steady her as she wobbled precariously on one foot. This was all she needed; not only was it *his* fault she was in this mess, now he'd succeeded in nearly giving her a heart attack with his creepy stealth- *and* broke the heel on her favorite pair of sandals!
Angel looked down at the brunette, noting the tremble of reaction on her full mouth, which was at odds with the fire of resentment and anger in her glittering eyes. She pulled away again with gritted teeth until, reluctantly, he released her.
“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you-” he began softly, only to be interrupted by a 'pfft'
“Since when has creeping up on unsuspecting girls at the dead of night *not* intended to scare the bejeebers out of someone?” she retorted sharply. Stooping to remove her broken shoe and resting her bare foot gingerly on the ground. She hissed with pain, realizing her ankle had sprained when her sandal had twisted beneath her.
When he stepped forward again, Cordelia waved the broken sandal in his face, “Back off, dumbass; I have wood and I'm not afraid to use it,” she threatened angrily.
A dark brow rose as he eyed the 'weapon'. “Wood?” the word sounded totally different when Angel said it; making her threatening words seem somehow provocative and a light flush tinted her skin, the hand holding the sandal aloft dropping to her side.
A light shiver ran down her spine. This was no time to recall her earlier- and-now-dead crush on him, she thought, her color heightening. That had been quickly quashed the moment she'd found out what he was.
“Hello? SunnyHell here; what did you expect? I'm not totally dense, regardless of what some think.” Angel folded his heavy arms across his chest and regarded the little spitfire, and then shoved his hands in his pockets. The soft tint of rose accentuated her natural beauty; calling out to the man he'd pushed deep after his doomed relationship with Buffy.
“So the whole walking-through-Sunnyhell at the dead of night isn't dense?” he threw her own words back at her and she deflated somewhat. He had a point.
“Yeah, well… not expecting my stupid car to play dead on me- *or* forgetting my stupid cell in my stupid locker at that stupid school…” she blew out a breath and attempted to put her weight on her foot and yelped- then yelped again when both feet left the ground.
The world spun dizzily and she reached out in panic, grabbing onto the nearest solid thing…that happened to be the thick neck of a certain vampire. “Put me down! -I can walk okay without your help.” Glaring into chocolate brown eyes that were suddenly too close for her liking, Cordelia thinned her lips and wriggled in his grasp, but he was immovable.
Angel settled her more comfortably in his arms and continued along the highway. “I'll take you home- just suck it up, Chase,” he stared her down as her mouth opened yet again to argue until it snapped shut audibly, her dark head turning angrily away.
His build dwarfed hers, and she wasn't as petite as some girls she could, but wouldn't mention. Her breasts crushed against his chest, and uncomfortably, Cordelia edged back as much as possible, but he only pulled her closer, aiming an irritated look down at her.
“Keep still, or I might drop you,” he warned, even knowing her fidgeting wouldn't unbalance him. Her body plastered against his was more than pleasant; the heat emanating from her was quickly absorbed into his cool flesh greedily.
Returning the light censure with a halfhearted glare, Cordelia settled, gripping his neck that little bit tighter. For all she knew, he might just drop her to make a point, she hmphed again and turned her face away from his.
For several long minutes, total silence enveloped them, until the vampire abruptly turned and walked towards the trees. Cordelia instantly froze in his arms. “Wha- hey! Where are you going?” her voice rose with each word and her arms tightened painfully around his neck as she eyed him anxiously.
“Shortcut.” brief and to the point, his reply hinted he'd done talking. She chewed nervously on her bottom lip and contented herself with looking around, wide eyes searching every dark crevice as they went along.
Angel could not believe the girl had made it this far without being attacked- or killed. He resisted the urge to shake the bundle in his arms, railing her for her stupidity. Surely she had some type of vehicle recovery insurance? -Okay, no cell, but it wasn't as if the staff at the Bronze would have left so quickly. Considering the brunette was more than aware of the demon activity in the world, she was a hazard to her own health- or had a death wish!
Cordelia Chase was successful as 'Bait girl' for a reason. Youth, beauty and confidence bordering on arrogance was a combination that tempted both humans and demons alike… Angel himself had noticed; his baser side drawn to it. Angelus had been a little more obvious in his interest, and had temporarily considered taking it further before being thwarted and then distracted again with his campaign to break and then destroy the Slayer.
It had been lucky for her that Angel had decided to acquiesce to walking Buffy home, otherwise he would already have arrived at the mansion; unknowingly leaving Cordelia to any vampire or Demon that most likely would have crossed her thoughtless path. Annoyance grew with every step he took, until a low growl rumbling through his chest had her slim arms instantly tightened around his neck.
“What? What is it? Can you see something?” her head twisted and turned attempting to look around and over his shoulder. If he'd been human, her arms would have asphyxiated him by now.
“Just a fox,” he lied effortlessly, and instantly her grip loosened, her face turning to his.
“A growl like that just for a tiny little predator?” a fine brow arched in dry amusement. Angel ignored the slight and continued walking. “Exactly how weak are you now?” she'd heard Buffy talking about his loss of strength shortly after his return- though he didn't seem to have a problem carrying her all the way home, for which she was grudgingly, grateful!
The vampire hadn't bothered to correct Buffy at the time. Although a little out of it and slight difficulty acclimatizing back to his own dimension, he hadn't been 'weak' at all, but he'd let the Slayer assume, not in the mood to put her straight- or indeed talk about his time in hell at all. As per usual, Buffy had done all the talking; the only difference being he hadn't hung onto every word she'd uttered as he had once.
Silence again blanketed the couple, and after a while, Cordelia's head gravitated towards his shoulder, the long walk earlier and the fear finally taking its toll. Her eyes closed with a tired sigh, her warm face nuzzling into his neck unconsciously. Angel's own eyes closed briefly at the moist heat of her breath against his cool skin, before forcing them open, shaking his head imperceptibly, and walking in a more measured pace in the hopes of not disturbing his burden.
As the gates of her home eventually came in sight, Angel wasn't unaware of the deja vu feeling of carrying Cordelia to this place… centuries later, but still he couldn't keep the shiver of reaction sliding along his spine.
It seemed his brief sojourn, as a bodyguard to the girl hadn't ended after all…
Part 3
”Sleep serenely, baby, slumber,
Lovely baby, gently sleep;
Tell me wherefore art thou smiling,
Smiling sweetly in thy sleep?
Do the angels smile in heaven?
When thy happy smile they see?
Dost thou on them smile while slum'bring
On my bosom peacefully.”
The warm lilting female voice surrounded and soothed almost as much as the warm arms that cradled her. The gentle rhythm of both words and rocking hypnotized her senses and she'd never felt more secure. Contentedly she snuggled deeper into the warm and soft embrace…. And then frowned a little as the plush cushion of feminine warmth melted away to be replaced by the hard inflexible plains of a muscular chest; the heat cooling quickly and her mouth turned down in a soft moue at the loss.
”An oath given under duress, if I recall, old man,” the unmistakable male voice harsh and angry, but his gentle grip around her strangely at odds with the savagery she then glimpsed on his dark face as she hazily peered up. A gasp of fear tore from her throat, as strangely empty eyes the color of burnished gold flicked briefly to her face before lifting to look straight ahead, disdain twisting his darkly handsome face. Thick, untidy strands of hair fell across his forehead and trailed over a sharp cheekbone and clenched jaw…
“Cordelia?” The same voice but softly spoken and almost tender caused her wide, fearful eyes to blink rapidly and the cold features shifted subtly to that of concerned lines and hesitating brown eyes. “ We're here.”
Dazedly Cordelia stared up in confusion before turning away to take in her surroundings and jolted in surprise to find she was outside the locked gates of her home. A brief image of roughened stone walls draped with rich tapestries flashed across her inner vision, accompanied by the unpleasant scent of acrid smoke, but it faded too quickly and all haziness cleared as the man holding her close to his chest spoke again.
“Are you okay?” Right. Flat tire, a walk on the wild and stupidly insane side; a broken heel and a very unexpected savior. Reality clicked and Cordelia's mind cleared. Releasing her death grip from his thick neck, she nodded irritable and wriggled until Angel set her on back her feet carefully. As she gingerly tested out her sore ankle her mind was doing cartwheels. The feeling that she was missing something really important nagged at her, but decided that now was not the time to look too deeply into it. Maybe later - when alone and safely tucked up in her bed.
“You fell asleep,” he explained unnecessarily reaching out a steadying hand as she took an unthinking step back, winced and lost her balance as her bare foot made contact with the cold ground.
Angel stared down at Cordelia silently as she attempted to ease her arm out of his grip in a way he figured that she'd hoped wouldn't look too obvious that it was far from welcome. It only made him want to tighten his hold, so he did.
“I can walk okay, jeeze. Bruise much,” she grouched out the little fib and then felt mean when he instantly eased his grip with an apologetic look on his face, but still he kept hold of her. Puffing out a resigned breath she stopped pulling at her captured arm and forced a bright smile onto her face. “Thanks for the ride.”
As soon as the words left her mouth, a flood of soft color rushed into her cheeks and burned at the brief quirk of his dark brow. For a moment, she could have sworn a gleam of wicked amusement flickered in his dark eyes and it unsettled her enough to make her drop her eyes uncomfortably. “You're welcome.” His tone low and tinged with a hint of sensuality that made her belly tingle.
Hold it right there, Chase! The last thing she needed on top of all the crap going on in her life was even a tiny reminder of the crush she'd once had on the guy. - vampire. Correcting herself mentally, adding Buffy's vampire. It did the trick and composure quickly returned.
Digging into the recesses of her purse, she found and brought out her car key fob, pressing one of the two buttons on it and moved out of the way of the gates as they slid open almost silently. “I'll walk you to your door,” Angel moved forward to walk through the opened gates only to stop when Cordelia refused to budge. Looking back a slight furrow marred his brow.
“I can manage from here.” She shrugged as the furrows deepened. “You've done enough for one night.” His big body stiffened at the same time as it occurred to her how ungrateful she sounded and instantly flashed another bright grin his way. “And thanks for that, by the way.” She added, her light tone almost as fake as the smile.
Angel's thoughts briefly went back to just before she woke up, her dilated eyes locking with his; strangely unfocussed yet obviously 'seeing' something that had caused her body to stiffen and drench the air with pure fear. When he'd spoken, her eyes had cleared, the fear fading, and he was left wondering what could frightened her so badly that the taste of it still clung to the back of his throat.
His dark eyes narrowed, familiar irritation flaring as Cordelia's 'Queen C' Armour slid as effortlessly back into place as the gates did now behind them.
Shrugging off the sudden desire to make more than a few dents in that veneer, and not understanding why he'd want to bother in the first place, Angel instead abruptly leaned down and scoop her into his arms, tightening his grip warningly when she immediately began to protest.
“I'll walk you to your door,” he repeated firmly, ignoring her mumbled complaints as he made his way up the long, dark tree-lined drive.
***
With a groan, Cordelia pulled the covers off her head and rolled over.
Another sucky day in this town. Just the thought made her groan again; and then frown, perplexed. Since when had Cordelia Chase not wanted to face the day?
Oh yeah. After the night Xander The Betrayer had put her heart in a meat grinder and turned the handle without another thought
But then again, was he really any different from some of the others she had the misfortune to know in SunnyHell? Jumping to conclusions...assuming she didn't have feelings - a heart, to hurt. Difference was, Cordelia had thought Xander Crappy Harris knew her enough not to believe that. Projecting a cool, uncaring veneer had its disadvantages too. Trouble was, it had never bothered her before.
Fair enough, not that surprised his totally unexpected infidelity would involve one of the Scoobies. Not like she’d been unaware his feelings for her came a third in his list of Important People in his life. But to be honest, it would have been less of a surprise if she’d walked in on him and Buffy. Less of a surprise, yeah, but it would have still hurt. Willow Rosenburg. Who’d athunk it? Not only does her so-called boyfriend cheat on her, but also he cheats on her with the least likely suspect.
A weary sigh dragged out of her throat and drowsy eyes stared vacantly at the ceiling above. Lately it seemed the only one to seem to give a crap was a certain vampire. Like she needed that right now. "How low can ya get?" she wondered out loud. "First my heart is trodden on and ground down like a coat stupidly covering a puddle, and then the last person I’d *ever* think would look at me twice with Buffy Summers around, decides to turn his attention to me."
What was with that, anyway? Two days ago, the vampire didn't even care that she existed, and now? He wouldn't leave her alone to drown in her own puddle. And right now, self-pity was a good place to be. Whether or not that made her a bad person; tough noogies. Everyone was entitled to wallow now and then- and she still had at least a week to go, according to her calendar.
She thought about last night and shifted uncomfortably between the soft 500-count Egyptian sheets. Was it wrong to enjoy being held in someone else's boyfriend’s arms? Had she sunk that low? But he isn't Buffy's boyfriend any more, the insidious voice whispered through her rapidly waking mind, and she pfft. Like that mattered.
"Cordelia Chase is no one's rebound, nuh, huh." She muttered under her breath, finally sitting up and dragging the sheets away. But you can't deny he's hot. the little voice poked at her remorselessly, causing a scowl to twist her lovely features. Yeah, like an undead guy can be hot. Get real. Semantics, shemantics... With a grr argh Cordelia dragged her long legs off the bed and got to her feet.
"Not listening" the two words repeated through her mind like a mantra as drapes were pulled back, letting in the early morning sun and bathroom ablutions were done with the efficiency of a robot.
Then there was that dream. The song still lingered in her head, along with the gentle voice that had made her feel.. Shrugging off the feeling, Cordelia absently hummed the tune as she chose her clothes for the day. The weird and creepy familiarity of the man’s face she’d hazily looked upon still lingered, but right now, working it out seemed both too much trouble and rather stupid. It was just a dream, jeeze.
Angel has made short work of the long and winding drive, and thinking about it now, she was more than glad not to have traversed it alone. Hanging on to his broad shoulders and refusing to speak her face had remained determinedly turned away from his, and the occasional burn of his eyes on the soft flesh of her cheek had reminded her just how bitchy she was being.
God, he’d surrounded her. Those arms could have held the world up effortlessly. She could easily get used to it- and that made her feel needy- which in turn annoyed the hell out of her, and it was with a sigh of relief, on arriving outside her front door that her arms released their tight hold and pushed at his broad chest. For a moment, Cordelia could have sworn Angel’s arms had tightened, his pale face reflecting annoyance- just for a brief moment, and then he’d set her down on her feet.
After regarding the darkened windows, he’d finally spoken, quietly asking if her parents were home, but she’d deliberately ignored his query. Their frequent absences was something Cordelia was unwilling to share with others, and now wasn’t any different. Instead, she turned her back on him on the pretext of fishing out her keys.
Finding them Cordelia glanced up before sliding the key into the lock, and she could have sworn a soft flicker of pity had darkened his eyes and her back had stiffened defensively. An unexpected rush of hot anger had shot through her. Her own self-pity right now was more than enough; she didn’t need or want his concern. Opening the heavy paneled door, she’d walked in the turned to face him, a tense smile stretching her lips as she again stiltedly thanked him for seeing her home. His eyes had searched hers, though God knows what he was looking for, and after a hurried goodnight she closed the wooden barrier between them.
As soon as the door clicked shut, shame had curled in Cordelia’s gut as it occurred to her she’d more or less slammed the door in his face; that thought causing her to re-open it. Finding him gone, she quickly closed it and shot the bolts.
Her conscience still bugged her even now though. He’d been good enough to go out of his way and make sure she got home in one piece, and Cordelia knew she’d been bitchy and ungrateful. Was there a way to make amends without it being too obvious? She wondered. The little voice whispered again, putting ideas into her head that made her blush and dismissing it doggedly, she instead continued with her new mantra. notlisteningnotlistening… By the time Cordelia had left her bedroom and descended the impressive staircase, the words had lost all meaning.
Cordelia paused in the foyer, cocking her head for a moment and listened intently.
As usual, silence greeted her. Most of the time, she was so used to being left to her own devices that she didn’t dwell too much on her loneliness. But today, for some reason, her heart ached. Leaving the empty house a grimace twisted her mouth recalling her lack of transport. With a heavy sigh, she made her way down the driveway, adding no wheels to her growing list of suckage...
Intro piece…taken from Suo Gan - traditional Welsh lullaby. It first appeared in print circa 1800.
TBC...
Serials
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