Go TeamC/A
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Part 5 "I'm not crazy!" The indignant voice rang throughout the hotel, indignant, angry, all kinds of humiliated and... To put it bluntly? Pissed. Her eyes narrowed, she glared at her parents - Angel thought he'd seen her pissed? He'd seen nothing...
"Only a crazy person would say that." Said Alara, nodding to her husband who was continuing to glare at Angel, a scowl evident on his face, "I knew we should have had her checked sooner..."
"CHECKED FOR WHAT?" Cordelia yelled, her eyes blazing. Fred, Gunn and Wesley (wisely) maintained their distance from the angry young woman before them, not even Angel was safe, one wrong word and Cordelia could explode.
"Well, there was that Harris boy for a start, and then there was..."
"Xander?" Cordelia stopped for a second, "What's wrong with Xander?" Did I really just say that?
"Well he was a little... Lower than your usual status, honey." Said Alara, gently, totally unaware that she was treading on very thin ice.
"Usual status?" Cordelia was puzzled, okay, so she did *have* a usual status back then, popular, rich and usually jocks but the fact that her Mom had gone past the 'Ooh, nice boy' stage was pretty much amazing.
"Well, yes, the popular boys. The good looking ones."
"Xander wasn't ugly!" She bit, noticing Angel's scowl. That hadn't exactly been exactly what Angel had wanted to hear. Okay, so even he'd admit that Xander wasn't on the particularly ugly crew but... He was a dork! But then... Cordelia called him a dork which introduced all sorts of problems for the 245 year old completely and utterly jealous vampire.
"You've got to admit that you were too good for him." The words were out of Angel's mouth before he could stop them and Cordelia gasped, turning round to glare at him. "ANGEL!" She yelled, "Don't YOU start!"
"What?" He asked, puzzled, "I'm just saying." He'd paid her a compliment! She WAS too good for Xander. She was his Cordelia, that meant that every single guy that had even had a crush on Cordelia, she was too good for. Except maybe Doyle. And that little thing with Welsey - 'cause they were his friends and Xander was...
"Well don't JUST SAY!" Said Cordelia, frowning, "Just..."
"Now, honey - Angel's only looking out for your best interests..." Said Alara, sweetly, detracting herself from Wesley's side and going to stand beside Angel.
"But... But you've just..." Cordelia sputtered, "He got demon goo on your clothes!" Clutching at straws much?
Alara smiled and waved her hand, "Oh, this old thing? Doesn't matter..."
THIS OLD THING? Cordelia's thoughts slammed into her head quicker than a vision, This old thing? She wouldn't hold Connor in case he got baby drool on her and now it's 'this old thing'?
"And then there was that weird girl..." Continued Alara. "You remember the one? She tried to attack you with a wooden stick."
If she hadn't been so pissed, Cordelia might have been impressed. While her mother was bed bound with Epstein Barr syndrome, she'd actually been listening to her daughter? Definitely a first for Alara Chase.
"Her name was Buffy." Said Cordelia, through gritted teeth.
"And what kind of a name is that?"
"MOM!" Too late. She'd exploded. "SHUT UP! God, will you let people get a word in edgeways?"
Angel raised an eyebrow at this, Cordelia was usually the dominant speaker while he was the one who sat back and waited. Something he'd learnd to do well over the course of almost 250 years.
"We'll book you an appointment with Dr. Truman just as soon as we get you back home." Said her father, "Perhaps it's best that you say your goodbyes now."
"No! I'm NOT crazy!" Said Cordelia, folding her arms indignantly across her chest. "And I'm not going anywhere! Angel, show them."
Both of Angel's treacherous eyebrows shot up in surprise. The vampire was famed for keeping his cool (most of the time) for not wigging (yeah, right) for not getting panicked over the least little thing (uh-huh) but this, he panicked over. "Show them what?" He asked, fear and trepidation marring his voice. He didn't want to do anything that would upset her father - after all, he was... Large and... Glowery... In pink.
"Your 'grrrr' face." Arching her fingers in the typical 'grrrr face' fashion, she'd never looked more adorable. It still didn't mean he was going to do what she asked though. And risk the wrath of her father? No chance.
"What 'grrrr' face?" He asked, coyly.
He recognised the signs almost immediately. A foot tapped against the hardwood floor, her arms slid across her chest (Where he *so* wasn't looking) and Cordelia arched one perfectly shaped eyebrow. "What Grrr Face?" She asked, her voice dangerously low. "Do you really want me to explain?"
Okay, let's assess the situation. Thought Angel, in a rare calm moment in the face of his biggest fear, bigger than Cordelia's Mother and Father combined. Cordelia's Wrath. Never fun. Briefly, he recalled the first time he'd felt her anger towards him. After his 'beige period' he'd never felt more helpless, more unable to do something when she was hurt or angry. He decided that Cordelia at this point was more dangerous - she could, after all, effectively kill him more than her parents could.
Sighing, Angel glanced at her father, letting his game face slide on. Ha ha! Victory for the lowly vampire! Cordelia's mother was stunned into silence. Her father however was less... Mute...
"WHAT IN THE HOLY HELL IS THAT?"
"HE is Angel." Said Cordelia, "You still think I'm crazy? He's a vampire. With a soul. He helps people." Alara slid bonelessly to the floor, after all this was just too much to take in one night, her daughter crazy and a man she'd considered to be an eligible bachelor a vampire with a very severe case of the bumpies. "B-but... Tom Cruise didn't look like that!" Said Alara, timidly.
They thought CORDELIA was crazy??? Fred watched from where she stood, mildly amused. Cordelia was battling against her parents, when Angel had leapt in with a comment that could only be described as jealousy - if anything, at least they were sorting out their little 'ballet' episodes.
"You can take the 'grrrr' face off now, son." When Aaron spoke, his voice was a degree softer (something which shocked Angel to no end). "He doesn't bite?"
Cordelia smiled for the first time since her parents had actually got here, "No Dad, he doesn't bite. He doesn't feed from humans, he helps people. That's where I fit in." She smiled. "I'm Vision Girl - the Higher Powers if you like... Show me when people need helping, how Angel can help them. That was how I floated before..."
"They make you float?"
Deciding that one (or three) shocks in one day was quite enough for her parents (even though the mischevious streak in the Seer wanted to shock them more) - Cordelia nodded, "Yeah, they make me float."
"Mr. Chase," Stepping forward, Wesley glanced at the pair, "I don't think I need to remind you that this... What Angel is, should remain between you and your wife only... If this were to get out it could spell danger for Connor..."
"I'm sure Tom Cruise didn't have those bumpy things... Was Tom Cruise a vampire, really?" Asked Alara, still shocked to the point where she was babbling incoherently. Well, actually, just shocked - the incoherent babbling seemed almost like her regular speech patterns.
"No, Mom, Tom Cruise wasn't a vampire. He goes out in the day-time, remember?" Asked Cordelia, softly. As much as her Mom pissed her off, this was still a big deal and... Oh, holy hell, her father really wasn't asking that, was he?
"Angel, can I talk to you alone for a second?"
Oh God... HE WAS! Cordelia watched as Angel gulped and nodded, "Sure."
"Use my office..." Offered Wesley, glancing at Cordelia after Angel and Aaron had retreated to the office, "Perhaps now you should discuss with your mother the... Finer points of Angel being a vampire?"
"Nope." Said Cordelia, "I'm taking Mom upstairs to meet her Grandson."
Part 6
Cordelia and her mother climbed the stairs to Connor's room, Alara watching Cordelia carefully. In a rare tender moment, Alara reached out and touched her daughter's arm, "You're happy, aren't you?" She asked, gently.
Nodding, the brunette met her mother's eyes, "I am." Said Cordelia, smiling. She was. Truly happy. She had Angel, her friends, Connor - everything she wanted.
"What about..."
Alara faltered, making Cordelia look up, "What about what?"
"Money?"
Her face fell into a frown. Tender moment over with, Cordelia shook her head, "Money's not everything, Mom." She said quietly. "It's not like I need it."
"But he provides for you?"
"Who, Angel? Mom, we haven't even admitted we like each other yet."
"But you know he likes you and he knows you like him?"
"Yeah..." Said Cordelia gently, "We were plotting your demise up here..." She teased, "Trying to get rid of you."
"We heard." Said Alara, making Cordelia gasp. They'd HEARD? She'd been plotting their deaths and everything!
"Oh..." Cordelia blushed, shaking her head, "I didn't mean that..."
"I'm kidding, honey. You're so strung up sometimes, lighten up!"
Creeping inside Connor's room, Cordelia pressed a finger to her lips, "Sshhh, he's asleep." She said softly. The two women tiptoed to the cot where Connor lay, his eyes pressing lightly on his cheeks, a finger stuffed in his mouth, the other clutching a stuffed penguin.
"He's so cute." Said Alara, watching as her daughter preened, slightly. She was definitely proud of her son. "Cordelia, what did Angel mean, you and he didn't..."
"We didn't." Cordelia watched Connor, her finger trailing lightly down his soft cheek. "Connor's mine in every way but one. Biologically. I still feel it though, that bond with him. He calls me Mom, and it feels like he's mine. He's the closest I'll ever get."
"Why?" Alara was puzzled, her daughter (minus the bad dress sense) was in every sense of the word, beautiful.
"Because I love Angel." Said Cordelia softly, "And Connor is like the equivalent to the Golden Child or something. Angel can't... Or shouldn't have been able to have kids... Connor's a miracle."
Alara smiled, gently, "Yeah, your miracle."***
Downstairs, a completely paranoid Angel had moved the baby monitor to the office, should anything happen and he'd heard everything...
Aaron frowned, having heard everything too, and glanced at Angel, "Perhaps it's time we went through some things... I have certain rules when it comes to my daughter."
Angel gulped...***
Cordelia and her Mom sat at the top of the stairs, staring down into the lobby of the Hyperion, "So, you're happy?" Asked Alara, for about the seventh time.
"Yes," Replied Cordelia, "I'm happy. Really happy."
"Good... Now you've just got to wait for Angel to pass your father's test..."
Cordelia raised an eyebrow, "Test?"
"Oh, sweetie, don't tell me you forget the RULES!"***
"Rule number four, You do not TOUCH my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off my daughter's body, I will remove them."
Angel sat there, looking agape at Mr. Chase. They'd been through four of his rules and already three of them had included a shot gun, a shovel and a grave. Okay, so this *shouldn't* scare him but... Well, it did.
"Rule number five," He continued, "I'm aware that fashions have changed since my day, even for a vampire. Right now, the current trend is for boys of your age..."
Angel raised his eyebrow, Boys? He was beginning to wonder which planet Mr. Chase actually came from...
"...To wear their trousers so loosely they appear to be falling off their hips. I am prepared to compromise. You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do NOT come off during your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely to your waist."
Angel shook his head, staring agape at a man who, in years to come, COULD be his father-in-law.
"Number six. I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilising a 'barrier method' of some kind can kill you. Let me make this simpler. When it comes to sex with my daughter, I am the barrier and I will kill you."
So, moving swiftly on then? Thought Angel, his mouth hanging open...
"Next rule. I have no doubt you are a popular young man, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry."
He felt like he'd walked into the Mafia and Cordelia's father was the one holding the gun... Not that a gun could kill him...
"Eight, do not lie to me. I may appear to be a pot-bellied, balding, middle-aged, dim-witted-has-been. But! On issues that involve my ONLY child, I am the all-knowing, all-seeing, merciless God of the universe. If I ask where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel and nine acres behind the house, do not trifle with me."
Okay, so NOW it was time to intervene, "Mr. Chase, Cordelia and I..."
"If ever you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful like changing the oil in my car?"
"Mr. Chase!" Said Angel, frowning, "If you'd just listen for..."
"Son, I have one more rule... Be afraid. Be *very* afraid. I can spot a lie a mile off, it takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper. When my inner possessiveness begins acting up, voices in my head tell me it's time to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. When you pull into the driveway, you should exit the car with both hands in sight..."
"DADDY!" The shrill voice of his daughter at the door to the office made Angel's spirits lighten for the vampire knew that on the wall hung many, many items of weaponry that truly were detrimental to his health and wouldn't just hurt beyond belief. Aaron's gaze shot guiltily up to his daughter, "Yes, sweetie?" He asked, meekly.
"Don't yes sweetie me!" Said the brunette, "I'm 20 years old! You're still treating me like I'm 15!"
"I was just..."
"Just what?" Asked Cordelia, her voice dangerously low... "I'm 20 years old... Not a child - and for your information, Angel has already had his hands on me!"
Angel gulped, stepping behind Cordelia as Aaron's eyes narrowed...
"Cordy, maybe that wasn't the best thing to..."
"He's... Touched... You..." Asked Aaron, pronouncing each and every word...
Angel gulped... Again...
Part 7
It was finally over. Tears had been cried... Blood had been spilled... And Cordelia's parents were truly gone. And Angel brooded... For he couldn't believe what he'd done. Alara had mourned for her husband, while Cordelia had met the 'tragedy' with a quiet acceptance, being strong for her mother's sake. It had started out so simply. Sure, there'd been times when he'd wanted to strangle Cordelia's father but had never wanted this to happen... It had started with a hammer... And ended in tragedy...
***
"You've had your hands on MY daughter?"
Angel could almost hear Cordelia's 'pfffft' in his head, could see the rolling of the eyes as she shook her head. "Dad, you have to calm down," Said the brunette, frowning, "It was pretty much a given that Angel would've had his hands on me if Connor was my son. Unless of course he was the immaculate conception..." Her eyes flashed mischeivously at Angel as she said this, for Connor, while he had been created from Angel getting groiny with his skanky blonde mother, he wasn't really supposed to be here... So, see? The immaculate conception.
"...Which I was," She continued, "But if I remember rightly, that's what you told my Grandfather to escape death by his shotgun, right?"
"Don't get smart with me, young lady..." Growled her father, glaring at Angel.
"Don't call me young lady! I'm not 15 years old anymore!" Yelled Cordelia, standing protectively in front of Angel, her hands on her hips. This, struck Angel, as wrong. Cordelia, *his* Cordelia was protecting HIM from her father. Wasn't he a champion? He'd faced minions from Hell by the thousand and he was scared of a man who vaguely represented the only roadblock other than the curse in his relationship with Cordelia. Well, Angel was a champion and he wasn't going to let a man who wore pink shirts (through no fault of his own) spoil his relationship with Cordelia.
"Okay, Mr. Chase, I think this has gone far enough..." Started Angel.
It was then, that he turned. Angel noticed that, for a man of his age (which okay, wasn't very old) he was pretty damned scary. He could only have been in his early 40's, but it was evident in a family like Cordelia's, that looks were everything. Maintaining that youthful edge, even if, for her parents, it was achieved by a surgical knife was all important. So this obviously meant that Mr. Chase, concerned with keeping his looks, would only be confident with weapons of some description. Shotguns... Shovels...
"OWWW!"
Or the first that he'd just shoved unequivocally into Angel's face.
"DAD!" Yelled Cordelia.
"Aaron!" . . . Alara's cry screeched through the hotel and it was then that Mr. Chase broke into a run. Angel maintained his dignity (by refraining from shrieking like a girl) and started running too. It wasn't that Mr. Chase scared him, not in the least. It was just that if a brawl started, could Angel honestly stop himself from... Well, putting it bluntly, killing the man? Yes, of course, that was the reason...
"DAD!" Yelled Cordelia again, something akin to a petulant teenager this time...
"Mr. Chase, I can explain..."
"What the two of you went upstairs and she fell onto your penis?!"
"DAD! Overreact much?" Cordelia was sick and tired of all the yelling, she was getting hoarse... And besides, ewww, hadn't she put up with the scary notion of sex that one time those sick noises had been coming from her parents bedroom? "I'm a grown woman!"
"That still doesn't mean he can have his hands all over you!" He barked.
Angel, being a vampire, had the advantage of vampiric speed and agility on his side... Most of the time, anyway. Lately, Cordelia noted, when he'd gone into full dork mode, his stealth advantage had been slipping - he no longer had the edge of sneaking up on her without her knowing he was there. Cordelia went forward as Angel slipped on something and went his length across the room into a door. However, the thing that he'd slipped on (which had provided hours of fun for Connor) skidded backwards, right into her father's path.
The hammer in question was a large, soft toy squeaky thing that Gunn had won for his nephew when he'd taken Fred to the fayre over at LaFayette park. He'd cursed his decision, however, only twenty minutes later, when the squeak and the constant banging against his head had drove him, quite literally, nuts. He'd wanted to pop the damned thing - but to slaps from both Cordelia and Fred, Charles Gunn was forced to endure his fate... At being slapped around by a one year old with a toy hammer.
"Daddy!"
"AARON!"
"Mr. Chase!"
<<< Crunch >>>
At first, it sounded like a demon... Crushing its prey between its fingertips, but when Angel turned? The fate he was about to experience was worse, much, much worse...***
"Doctor, can we see him?" Asked Alara, sniffling loudly - she'd deliberately kept her eyes away from Angel at *all* times. Even those times when he held her grandson back at the hotel. Now, they stood at the hospital, Angel, Cordelia and Alara. Fred, Gunn and Wesley had agreed to keep watch over the baby while they waited... It had seemed like a lifetime in which Angel brooded, Cordelia sat there in reserved silence and every so often a fresh burst of sobs would escape Alara's lips.
"He's asked to see his family..." Nodded the Doctor, "Including his... Son in law?" The way the Doctor hesitated made Angel look up. Okay so the words had obviously come out of Aaron's mouth himself but the way the Doctor said them? Angel had a feeling it spelled uh and most certainly oh...
He wasn't even aware they'd shuffled forward until he heard the "Oh, honey..." From Alara's mouth. There on the bed, a mask covering his face, lay Aaron, barely able to breathe. Angel shuffled again, glancing at Cordelia who was successfully keeping her eyes away from his too - this was bad, very bad.
"Son, we need to talk..." He rasped, breathlessly.
Oh God, not another one of Cordelia's father's TALKS! Angel frowned and simply nodded, "Yes, Sir."
"First of all... That place is like a damned death trap waiting to happen, you saw what happened to me back there. You're bringing my Grandson up in that?"
Cordelia frowned, "Daddy, Connor is a child. He plays with things, just because you don't watch where you're going doesn't mean the place is a death trap. Besides, exactly how old are you? Chasing Angel round the hotel like it's some kind of cat and mouse game!"
Angel looked at Cordelia, surprised. He'd thought she was pissed at him.
"And another thing, I'm 20 years old, if I want to sleep with every man in LA, I will, it's none of your business. As it so happens, the only man I ever want to sleep with is standing right next to me but if we do, he'll turn evil and kill us all so I'm thinking maybe... Hmmm... Not."
Angel frowned, "Hey!"
"Well, it's true. Doesn't mean I love you any less, does it?" She asked.
*She loves me?* Thought Angel, his mouth falling open accordingly.
"B-but look at my nose!" Said Aaron, "How can I go in for the office photographs looking like this?" He was a man who prided himself on his looks - but, fact being, he'd been the one chasing Angel round the hotel, he'd tripped over the damned hammer and it was him who'd flown into the stairs head first. Angel at least, even in his less than stealthy mannerisms, had managed to hit a door and not break his nose. "Look at my nose!" He said again for effect.
"Dad, it'll heal." Said Cordelia, "The doctor said the swelling should go down in a few weeks, you're going to be fine. You can even go HOME tonight!"
"WEEKS? WEEKS?!! But... But..."
"For God's sake it's only a bunch of photographs!" Said Cordelia, shaking her head. "For the past three hours I've heard you call me crazy, lay down a bunch of stupid rules to my 250 year old boyfriend, think a demon was from the projects and ask why Tom Cruise didn't look like Angel when he went all 'Grrrr'. There's only so much a girl can take, even if she is from Sunnydale!"
"What are you saying?" Asked her father, his voice muffled under the protective mask.
"I'm saying... GO AWAY! Be normal parents! Only come to visit me and piss me off on Christmas, and birthdays... I'm saying... I love you but for the love of God you have to leave before *I* kill you, never mind Angel!"
"B-but..." Started Aaron, frowning, "I'm not letting him..."
Smiling sweetly, Cordelia stepped forward, "Dad. My loving, wonderful father. I fear I should warn you. When Angel and I get home tonight, there'll be a LOT of touching. In fact, Angel's hands will go places no other mans have been before... And there's not a thing you can do about it. If you try, which I'm sure your not stupid enough to do, because after all, you had me and I'm pretty darned astute when it comes to certain things... To jeopardise any of my happies with Angel tonight? I'll do a lot worse than the stairs did. I'm a demon, I know stuff..." She nodded. "You don't wanna piss me off..."
Aaron paled... And Alara snickered behind her hand, coming over to kiss her daughter on the forehead, "So that's a date, for Christmas then?"
Cordelia breathed a sigh of relief, "As long as you're not cooking Mom, I think I can handle it." She said with a grin, then leaned over, kissing her father gently, "Anything else to say Daddy?"
He scowled looked at Angel, "Remember Rule Number 7?"
Oh God, what was this? Pop Quiz time? Was that the one with the shotgun... Or the Golden Gate bridge or...
"It still stands." Said Aaron firmly, "If you make my daughter cry, I will in turn make YOU cry."
Relaxing considerably, Angel took Cordelia's hand in his, "I promise, Mr. Chase. I won't ever make your daughter cry." With another kiss to both her parents from Cordelia, they left... Walking in silence until Cordelia looked up at him, "Y'know, no one likes a kiss ass."
"What?" Taken aback by her comment, Angel half-turned to look at his beautiful, wilful friend as they neared the hotel, "I'm not a kiss ass!" He intoned, indignantly.
"Oh you SO are! You told them, for one, that Xander wasn't up to my usual standard and then you won't show them your Grrr face for fear of what they'll think of you!" She laughed, "You're a kiss ass!"
"Cordelia, I'd like to not have your parents wanting me dead every time we visit," Said Angel, rationally.
"Angel, my father could hand pick me a guy who's stalwart and true from a bunch of guys that he handpicked because of their morals or some other such crap and still want to kill him every time they met. You're no different. Well, you are..."
"How's that?"
"Because I happen to have the hots for you," With that, Cordelia ran up the steps into the Hyperion and up the stairs past a bemused Wesley and Lorne, sitting playing a card game. Angel followed to a point from Lorne and found Cordelia standing over the crib, a silly, sweet grin on her face. "Look."
Angel stepped forward and smiled, Connor's fist shoved in his mouth as his little chest rose and fell with each breath he took. "Cordelia?"
"Yeah?"
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure..."
"About this Christmas and birthday thing... Can we... Be out of the country when they come around?"
Cordelia started to laugh, "Are you kidding me? My Dad would have his shotgun ready quicker than you could blink..."
"Well I had to at least try..."
Cordelia turned and kissed him, grinning, "I'll think about it," She whispered, "Promise..." With that, the two fell on the bed, kissing and laughing accordingly.
And from the crib, a child who was supposed to be asleep opened one sleepy eye, grinning...
Mom happy + Dad Happy = Nice
Oh yeah, that boy was a genius.
End
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